Meet the Tsukinos
by Ummster
Summary: Faced with problems with Toxic Mold, Mamoru and Usagi, newlywed, are forced to evacuate Mamoru’s apartment and move in with the Tsukinos.  Can Mamoru handle this crazy family? Humor and romance ensues.
1. Grand Entrances

Chapter one  
_Meet the Tsukinos_

Grand Entrances  
_By Ummster_

A/N: 

Summary: Faced with problems with Toxic Mold, Mamoru and Usagi, newly-wed, are forced to evacuate Mamoru's apartment and move in with the Tsukinos. Can Mamoru handle this crazy family? Humor and romance ensues. 

This was originally the third chapter of Déjà vu, but the whole feeling didn't go with that story, so I decided to add another story. No, this is not a one shot. It's hardly serious, but hopefully, entertaining. 

Just beware of summer school and meddling musical activities which may prevent me from updating at a reasonable time. 

Hope you like this installment! Interestingly this story will be mostly in Mamoru's point of view. Read, enjoy, and review, as always! 

Disclaimer: The characters of sailor moon do not belong to me. 

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_Prologue:_

A tall, lanky man of twenty-eight stood firmly rooted outside a red suburban door, his eyes twitching between the blonde beauty beside him and the button that formed the doorbell of the house. His arms had inched around her back and to her waist where they settled, squirming with discomfort, his raven-shrouded, boyishly handsome face writ with anticipation. The girl looked up at him with surprise as he raked a shaky hand through his long dark bangs and rolled up the cuffs of his dress shirt, her expression suddenly turning to one of bemusement as a sly smile crept onto her face.

"Mamo-chan," Usagi murmured, linking her hands behind his neck and resting on her tiptoes to brush noses with him, "you're too scared to go inside, aren't you?"

"Of course not," he husked, his soulful blue eyes turning to her, groaning as she deliberately brushed her lips against his tantalizingly. Golden strands of hair tickled his neck as she bent closer, her sky-blue eyes and long lashes enticing.

"Mamoru…" she began, kissing his cheek, then falling lower to his neck, "how can you be my knight in shining armor if you don't even ring the doorbell?"

"Your father hates me," he tried, hoping with that single remark they could roll their luggage back into his black Mercedes and drive on home without another word. It had been a good six months since he'd last met Usagi's family, and every time it was torturous. Mr. Tsukino insisted on calling him 'boy' and threatened to castrate him if he so much as touched his daughter. Usagi's brother, Shingo, pestered him to no end, the little nuisance. The only member of the Tsukino family that was decent to him was Mrs. Tsukino, but every time he met her it was as if he was meeting her for the first time- she never seemed to remember who he was.

"So does that sweet little ice-cream boy from down the street, but he still gives you your money's worth, doesn't he?" Usagi remarked sweetly.

"But this is different." Mamoru inhaled sharply as she began toying with his tie, the little tease. "I can't bribe your father." Somehow he regretted not bringing his suit. He must've forgotten it along with the toxic mold. 

"Sure you can!" she perked, "And it all begins by ringing the doorbell." A finger grazed her chin pensively. "By the way, he likes dark chocolate. Just like you. See, you guys already have things in common! That's the basis for a relationship."

"Usagi, I want him to like me, not marry me." He paused. "Tell me again why we couldn't just bunk with Motoki and Reika?"

Usagi slapped his back and he fell forward, staggering. She sure could slap hard. "They want their alone time, silly! They're newly weds."

"So are we."

He did have a point. She bit her lip, her hands crawling into his hair and pulling him down to get a taste of her lips. "Please?" She pouted, her eyes widening. "For me?" Mamoru signed, knowing that he couldn't possibly resist his little angel.

"Alright, fine," he grumbled, his finger pushing the fated red button, hearing the expected "dong" of the doorbell. Usagi's fingers fell off him and she took a step back, her hands falling to her hips. "Wait a minute…did you just seduce me into ringing the doorbell?" That little minx…

"Yep." She was chewing on her nails now, scared of that devilish look on his face- his lips curled upwards, his left eyebrow raised, and his ocean blue eyes twinkling mischievously. Usagi blinked, trying to divert her attention from his enrapturing orbs, finding her attempts futile.

"Oh, don't even go there Usako…" he whispered hotly into her ear, "You have no idea of the things I could make you do with a little seducing…"

"Oh?" she breathed, her eyes closing drowsily as he trailed a flight of butterfly kisses up her collarbone, "What exactly would I do, Mamoru?"

"Only one way to find out," he said huskily as he bent over her, his hands and mouth claiming the body he knew was his and would always be his. (A/N: Ok, a little sexist but…oh well. It sounds kind of cute, like he's protective or something. Don't worry, I'm all for female empowerment: D –dee: Anne Paul! Haha)

"Oh, for the love of God…" a voice piped. Mamoru turned to find the door swung open and a beach-blonde boy of about twelve peering at them with evident disgust. Usagi blushed as Mamoru straightened his tie while clearing his throat.

"Hello Shingo," he retorted stiffly. Usagi stifled a giggle at the formality, watching as her brother frowned up at the man who towered a near two feet above him.

"If only you had a British accent."

"Why's that?" Mamoru asked curiously.

"Cause that would make you even cornier." Shingo laughed as Mamoru shuffled his feet awkwardly, then yelled in pain as his sister pinched him in the arm.

"What was that for?" he screeched, rubbing his arm and retreating far away from the door.

"For being a brat." The boy rolled his eyes sardonically. "Go get mom." He grumbled and the door swung shut again. 

In a second Mamoru had grabbed Usagi to his chest, and held her there, nestled in his arms, savoring the feeling of her head resting against his chest. "Mamoru?" she asked, startled, squirming out of his hold. 

"Don't talk, Usagi," he murmured, pushing her head back onto his chest, "This is probably going to be the last time we'll be able to display affection in a long, long time."

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"Tell me again why you're here?" Ikuku asked, blonde ringlets framing her hazel eyes as she passed the bowl of spaghetti across the table to Usagi. Mamoru stared helplessly across the table at his in-laws as hearty chatter enveloped the room. It was the oddest sight he'd ever witnessed. Usagi, as always, was shoveling endless strands of spaghetti into her mouth at the most rapid pace he'd ever seen, competing against her younger brother who sat across from her, who came in at a near second, though much less clean. Little dribbles of chunky tomato sauce dripped around his mouth as he laughed, little chunks of meat evident from between his teeth. He was sitting to the right of Usagi, across from Mrs. Tsukino, who seemed to have, yet again, forgotten who he was, and as far as he could tell, had not yet noticed him. At the head of the table sat the head dictator, Kenji, the most interesting and menacing of them all. His brown hair had been slicked back, effectively concealing his balding scalp. Under this thin shroud of hair interrupted two bushy, brown eyebrows which just about covered the tip of thick eyelids and dark brown, omniscient eyes.

"Toxic mold, ma," Usagi repeated for the tenth time, helping herself to a good bowlful of pasta and meatballs. "It's poisonous. We can't stay in Mamoru's apartment anymore."

"And who's this young man you've brought with you?" Oh, so she'd noticed him.

Mamoru took a moment to choke on his lunch, effectively stopping the blow by pounding on his chest. "Mom! That's my husband! Mamoru!" She pointed. "Anything?"

She blinked. "Oh. Sorry, honey." Shaking her head sadly she turned back to her plate, placing a forkful of pasta in her mouth. "He looks different."

"Ahh…" Mamoru glanced at Usagi warily. He'd met them only six months earlier for their wedding. She smiled apologetically, patting his shoulder soothingly. Unable to resist, he snatched her hand off his shoulder and kissed it, flashing her a dashing smile. She giggled softly.

He instantly regretted it. "Oh don't you go romancing her, boy!" Mamoru stiffened as a pair of fierce brown eyes bore into him, and gulped. He knew who that was.

"Ah, Mr. Tsukino," he began smoothly, attempting to prompt casual conversation, "I hear you like dark chocolate."

Kenji snorted. "That's true. But mark my words boy, you are _not _dark chocolate material."

Mamoru paused. "Milk chocolate?"

"Nope."

"White chocolate?"

"Nope." 

"What, then?" He was growing desperate.

Kenji paused mid-bite. "Almond. 'Cause you're nutty, that's what you are." Kenji and Shingo burst into laughter while Mamoru and Usagi stared. Ikuku frowned and wagged a fork at her husband.

"I personally don't see what's all that wrong with the child. He's a fine specimen of a man if you ask me." She squeezed his toned bicep for emphasis. "Look at this kid." He held his breath as his mother-in-law grabbed hold of his chin and tilted it to the side, showing him off like some sort of prized pig. "Look at those cheekbones. Look at that hair. Look at those _eyes."_

"Oh, honey, looks certainly aren't everything," Kenji snarled. "I hate good-looking men. They're all the same. Just take advantage of you and then dump you out on the street with nothing but a soda can and a cup of coffee as a reminder."

"Cup of coffee?" Ikuku asked incredulously.

"Hell, yeah." Kenji laughed. "Can't live without coffee." With that he took a long, leisurely sip out of his 'Dad of the Year' mug, letting a languid sigh as the liquid slipped down his throat.

"Mr. Tsukino, you do know that we're married?" He chose to ignore the question and turned his attention to wrapping strings of pasta around his fork.

"Well I, for one, agree with mom," Usagi piped, squeezing his cheeks together and forcing him to smile. "Mamoru's head surgeon of the Tokyo University Hospital. He's brilliant."

"Don't you have to be like…forty to be a doctor?" Shingo asked. Kenji nodded.

Mamoru rubbed at his jawbone, attempting to restore the feeling. "I was accepted into medical school my second year of college." He shrugged, trying to shake it off like it was a regular accomplishment, though he knew it was quite the contrary.

"I told you, he's a keeper," Usagi boasted, grinning and pinching her husband's cheek again. 

Mamoru sighed, plugging another forkful of pasta into his mouth. It was going to be a long day.

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A/N: What do you think? Like where I'm going? Want to make a suggestion? Send me a review!


	2. The Guest Rulebook

Chapter 2

_Bedroom Mayhem_

Meet the Tsukinos

_By Ummster_

A/N:

I forgot to say, as a reviewer pointed out to me, that this fic IS A/U. Slightly. They're not king and queen…though if you want you can imagine them as such. They're just normal people. Slight references to sailor moon will be made so you can imagine what their past was like. However, they don't live at a palace or anything like though. Perhaps you could imagine that the palace was filled with toxic mold…though that's a bit unbelievable.

And also, Usagi's parents aren't really the way I portray them, but I repeat, this is slightly A/U so I made them extremely weird for my own enjoyment. I love crazy families, and I wanted to try my take.

Some references to Harry Potter…I'm guessing people read that in Tokyo..so (well they read it in India! I'm serious! Lines started the day after it came out or something…)

Actually I've never seen Meet the Fockers or Parents so no references will be made from that. I just thought it would be funny to have a similar name…a bit catchy! ;P hehe…I'll get around to seeing the movie possibly…I hear it's good…(though I know it is very late…but then again I am a very late person. I see most movies when they come out on DVD. Excepting the REALLY important ones).

I apologize in advance for this chapter. I'm in a testy move. And I also have a perverted sense of humor.

Oh and by the way…I'm having fun reading the manga over here! Teehee I had --- stuck in my head the whole time I was writing this. I have no idea why. I know that makes no sense whatsoever. I had a dream they were dancing to it…it was weird…

...correction. It was more like a nightmare.

Disclaimer: The characters in this story belong to Naoko Takeuchi. (She is brilliant :D)

(A/N: I just want to make this clear. It's the morning, everyone.)

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"Usako..." he murmured gently in his sleep, "I love you…"

Mamoru rolled uneasily to his side, attempting to pull the covers over himself in his current state of semi-consciousness. Loose strands of his deep black hair had somehow wandered into his mouth. He spit them out gruffly. Stupid hair. It was a nuisance really, to never be able to flatten it against his head. It always seemed to bounce back up messily. Apparently, however, that was what Usagi liked about it. It was unruly. She liked to spend long hours playing with his hair, crawling her hands up his scalp amusedly. Mamoru didn't understand what was so humorous but apparently she found it entertaining. Although he did concede that sometimes while she was sleeping he would bend over and twirl long golden curls around his finger.

Feeling another annoying slap of cool air to his backside, he again tried to grab hold of a loose section of the blanket spread. To his exasperation, the plain white covers wouldn't budge. A tentative smile adorned his face. It had taken a substantial amount of time and effort to persuade Usagi that no, he did _not_ want to sleep under bunny covers. With a slight grumble, he tugged at the edge of the sheet, feeling it suddenly rip lose from its hold, wherever that had been. Mamoru barely made out a soft whimper, which he dismissed as simply the wind. (Evidently he wasn't as smart in his sleep- at this time of day he believed that the wind whimpered). He moaned in satisfaction as he brought the covers up snugly over his head and burrowed his ebony-shrouded head into the pillow that had seemed to emerge suddenly by his side. It felt pleasurably smooth…a bit on the warm side but then again, he wasn't complaining…

"Mmmph," he heard someone mutter, followed by a loud, horrified belch. "Aaaarrrrrrgggghhhhhhhh!"

He bolted upright in a heartbeat. Mamoru supposed it came from years of practice waking up from _very_ disturbing dreams about princesses and imperial crystals. "NAAAANIIII?!" He hollered, blue eyes squinting against the glare of the blaring sun. "YOU WANT ME TO FIND YOUR STUPID IMPERIUM SILVER CRYSTAL? WELL I'LL TELL YOU WHAT'S STUPID-"

"Mamo-chan?" Usagi whimpered, genuinely concerned, sitting up next to him. "I had no idea you felt so strongly about those old dreams you used to have."

He smiled sheepishly. "Oops. It's just a reflex. Not that the crystal's stupid, but it was kind of annoying being woken up in the middle of the night everyday…"

Usagi cocked her head to the side, taking him in leisurely. His hair was tousled and some strands had somehow found their way down his cheek. She bent over, brushing them away with nimble fingers and watched as he turned red suddenly.

"Umm, Usagi, you might want to…" Her overly large shirt had sagged a little as she had bent over, revealing a bit more than she had bargained for. It was Mamoru's, actually, one of the very rare t-shirts he had brought with him. He claimed he was a strictly suit man (A/N: like Steve Harvey) and so he dumped all his free shirts on her. This particular one had been won at the arcade one lone summer day when Mamoru had, surprisingly, decided to test his skills on the Sailor V game.

She blushed profoundly. "AYA!!" (A/N: I love that word!) She snatched the covers from his grip, effectively covering herself, and stuck out her tongue, but the shirt still hung over her shoulder a bit. "Baka, if you didn't have a blanket-fetish I wouldn't have screamed for," Usagi coughed uneasily, "lack of, um, protection."

He looked murderous. "Please don't tell me that's why you woke me up." She nodded and smiled weakly. That and he had been sleeping on her stomach. Oops. It was one thing to bother Mamoru during the day, but he was practically venomous in the morning. Among other things. Luckily, it was the one time of day, perhaps, that she could outsmart him.

Apparently there was no need, for he himself changed the topic. "I do NOT have a blanket fetish."

"Oh, yes you do."

"No I don't."

"Yes you do."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"No."

"Yes. Wait…" Ah, the immortal switching technique. He himself had applied it on her numerous times, though, as we have already gone over, Mamoru was a bit slow during the morning. He sighed and rolled over, his head propped against the clasped hands behind his back, the breeze rustling gently against his bare chest.

Usagi chuckled. "You're silly."

"What?"

"Uhh, Nothing." It was her turn to change the topic. "Mamo-chan, were you dreaming about me again?" She vaguely remembered him whispering her name. Her tongue stuck out adorably, and he actually had to bite his own to keep from getting too aroused. Of course, she had no idea, soft blonde strands framing her face, highlighted by the sunlight sweeping in from the unveiled window. She looked perfectly angelic.

"Mhm." He nodded his head and flushed a little. He'd learned that it was better to give in quickly, rather than beat around the bush. Usagi was an expert seducer, if anything, and it was not good business to get entangled in that.

"You know Mamoru, I'm beginning to think I'm going to have to get a restraining order on you. You're addicted to me. First you have these creepy dreams about a princess, who just so happens to be _me, _and now…" She perked her head and bent closer. "What do you say? I'll have you shipped off to some sort of bachelor's home for the old and balding."

He quirked an eyebrow. "Oh no you didn't."

Usagi grinned back at him. "Oh yes I did."

"Come 'ere, you," he murmured huskily, before falling over her and planting a big one on her all too suspecting lips. "You're right about the addicted part, at least." He pulled the covers over them both hurriedly, dipping down to cover her neck. "The rate I've got you you'll be covered in bruises by tomorrow morni-"

She squealed suddenly and pushed him off her. "NO! Mamo-chan! Quick! Pretend you're sleeping!"

"Wha-" he began, too startled to react quickly enough. In a vain attempt to redeem herself Usagi burrowed herself under the covers while the scantily clad Mamoru towered over the bulging spot under the covers, dumbstruck. In a second their bedroom door swung open and Kenji and Ikuku Tsukino strode in, Kenji murderous and Ikuku perplexed.

"We heard screaming!" Ikuku began, before Kenji stormed angrily towards the baffled young man in question, grabbed him by the skin (A/N: owww, painful) and slapped him clear across the cheek.

"Ooow," were his last words before he collapsed over the mattress.

"Daddy!" Usagi screeched, suddenly emerging from under the mound of fluff, her hair unkempt. "What are you doing to my husband?" Mamoru had regained consciousness, no doubt the result of his psychometry, but thankfully no one seemed to have noticed but Usagi. She frowned at him apologetically, then turned back to her parents. Kenji stood with his arms crossed at the side of the bed, towering over Mamoru, while his wife leaned against the door frame, gaping in disbelief.

"Wha- what," she sputtered uneasily, pulling at her blue ringlets in hesitation, "were you two doing, exactly?"

Mamoru blinked and looked at Usagi in disbelief. She smiled weakly up at her mother and attempted to pull her shirt down to cover her bare thighs. To her annoyance, that just created another problem. With a little groan she pulled the covers up over herself. "We were sleeping." Mamoru sighed and rolled his eyes. Oh dear. _3…2…1…_

"TOGETHER?!" Kenji roared unceremoniously. _And blow._ He grabbed a fistful of Mamoru's hair as he grumbled in annoyance, "My little girl is turning into a-"

"-woman?" Usagi piped helpfully, not sure of what he had been about to say. "Daddy dearest, I've legally been a woman for six years now. Physically it's been a bit longer…er…" she suddenly regretted that she'd said that, and effectively covered her mouth, retaining that she wouldn't be speaking again for a while.

"WHAT!?!" Her father hollered at the ceiling, "AM I HEARING RIGHT?" Tiny beads of sweat dripped off of his forehead and onto the bridge of Mamoru's nose, which he had dragged up to his face. (A/N: Eeeew!) The latter sneezed into his face, then flushed red. He knew exactly what they were referring to, and according to his calculations, Kenji wouldn't be over it for another 7.6+ years. If they were lucky, that is.

"I TOLD YOU TO SLEEP ON THE FLOOR!" he bellowed, eyes glinting maliciously. "Mark my words, boy, you'll pay for this!"

"Mr. Tsukino…ah…you didn't actually specify where I was supposed to sleep…"

"SILENCE!" Kenji shouted again, his wife intelligently cowering in the shadows, her long-lashed, teal eyes peering fearfully from behind the curtains. "This calls for an emergency family meeting!" His beady eyes narrowed. "You agree, don't you, Mamoru?"

Mamoru sweat-dropped, gulping audibly. His eyes had turned cobalt, and a hand raked through his raven black hair uneasily. He looked down at himself with a little frown, realizing that boxers probably wouldn't apply as 'decent clothing' to the man. Jumping up suddenly, Usagi hopped off the mattress rather unceremoniously and rushed towards their suitcases, throwing her husband the first thing she came across; one of her lacy, midnight blue satin robes. He threw it on without hesitation, too preoccupied with the current situation to realize that he presently flaunted woman's lingerie. Usagi, however, found it quite amusing, and while stifling a giggle, conceded that the flowery embroidery was quite flattering. It nicely complimented the hue of his gorgeous ultramarine eyes.

"Yes…" he replied hesitantly. A resounding silence followed.

'Yes, sir."

"There's no need to call me sir, Mr. Tsukino." It had been an automatic response, yet as soon as the words left his mouth he instantly regretted it, mumbling something about how Harry Potter was affecting his brain (A/N: Yes, that phrase is from the Half Blood Prince. Harry uses it on Snape). Mamoru flinched and muttered every curse imaginable under his breath as Kenji turned crimson and embarked on an endless tirade explaining the exponential decrease in respect for elders accompanying each successive younger generation.

Unfortunately, halfway through the philippic Mamoru suddenly realized what Usagi had, conveniently, thrown to him while he had only been half in his right mind, and with a very feminine (the clothing must have had some effect) squeal succeeded in chasing her crazily around the room. Kenji, oblivious, continued his dynamic tirade.

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"What is this again?"

"A family meeting." Pause. "This must be serious. The last time Daddy called one of these was when I was ten and he caught me in Victoria Secret." Usagi blushed a little. "I don't think he ever got over it."

Mamoru quirked an eyebrow, his expression incredulous. "_Victoria Secret_, Usako? When you were _ten_?"

"Well the window displays were pretty…"

"Mhm." He snorted delectably, intelligently deciding to ignore the thought of the little innocent ten-year old Usagi strutting into a store full of naked manikins. "If this is a _family meeting, _then why are we the only ones here?"

"Apparently it only involves us."

"Oooh."

Usagi rubbed his arm soothingly, batting her eyelashes seductively. "Don't get too tensed. I'm sure this will be over in no time." She kissed his prickly, unshaven cheek. There had no time for grooming; Kenji had dragged him down too quickly. He had, however, vainly attempted to retain his dignity by throwing on a button-down dress shirt (surprise, surprise) and a pair of jeans.

He groaned. "Yeah, you're one to tell."

Mamoru still hadn't forgiven Usagi for the incident earlier, but he couldn't afford to remain angry at her for much longer. After all, he needed a friend in this estranged household. He was currently seated stiffly on the long, polka dotted coach in the foyer (undoubtedly, which Usagi had picked herself), his arms crossed against his chest with the petite form of his wife cuddled up next to him. He looked down at her gruffly, frowning at her peaceful countenance. For god's sake, they were going to be interrogated!

Just as the thought crossed his mind, the so-called 'interrogator' strode into the room and cleared his throat rather hoarsely. Usagi sprang to the other end of the coach with a little 'eep' and briskly allowed her mother to plop down between them. Ikuku smiled at Mamoru. "How are you honey?"

Mamoru was puzzled, but decided it wise to be respectful. "Er…fine, thank you. And you Mrs. Tsukino?"

She shrugged, her blue hair bouncing against her back childishly. "Positively enthralled to be here! Thank you for asking! My, aren't you a nice young man?" Mamoru, in exasperation, looked pleadingly at Usagi, who merely rolled her eyes and laid a head full of golden curls on the arm rest. A chill ran through his spine. For the first time in his life, he suddenly realized, he was terrified out of his wits. Sure, he had been frightened before, but never terrified. This was definitely worse than battling Metalia or Galaxia, or any evil minion for that matter, because to win he needed to look _good _in the other's eyes. He considered it with a wry smile.

"IKUKU!" Kenji screeched, striding into the room with a few sheets of paper tucked under his arm. "I will not have you conversing with the enemy!" His eyes slit menacingly. "As for the two of you, this will be your Bible for the rest of your stay here." He extended a sheet towards Mamoru, who gripped it shakily, his dark blue orbs skimming over its contents:

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Guest Rulebook:

_Note__: All rules have been applied strictly to restrict all violent and pedophilic activity, and may be applied at the discretion of approved family members. All males bearing the surname Chiba are denied approval, and therefore will be regarded as Guests. _

_Rule #1: In the foyer rests a certain red polka dotted couch. All afore mentioned guests will sleep on said couch; and __everyday must thank__ god that t__hey even have somewhere to stay after they were kicked out of their own houses._

_Rule #2: __Public Displays of Affection, otherwise known as __P.D.A's are strictly prohibited. For that matter, D.A. is also prohibited.__ The Tsukino residence is committed to maintaining the good __health __of all of its members. By common knowledge, contact of any kind bears the risk __of serious disease._

_Rule #3: __Any member of the household may imply methods of self defense against guests if they deem it necessary for their own well__-__being._

_Rule #4__: Said guests are not permitted to leave the household with a resident without proper supervision._

_Rule #__5__: Ogling, hereby defined as retaining eye contact with a residential member for more than thirty seconds, will not be permitted._

_Rule #__6__: At all times, guests must follow a strict dress code. This prohibits any revealing of skin excepting the facial area._

_Rule #__7__: Guests must effectively contribute to the welfare of the household. This includes doing chores, etc. _

_Rule #__8__: All rules go into effect after distribution of this pamphlet__, with a ten minute grace period._

_Rule #__9__: If guest, in any way, are found disobeying any of the preceding rules, luggage will be removed and guest will be restricted from entering the house. No questions asked._

_Rule #__10__: Amendments may only be made by the drafter of this Rulebook, Kenji Tsukino._

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It seemed at that moment, all consciousness left the so-called guest of the Tsukino's as he pounced on their daughter, not caring that they were in full view of her parents, only one thought repeating through his half-dissipating mind: _Shit__, I've only got ten minutes to make love to this woman._

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A/N: I've actually written part of the next chapter already, and that's why this chapter seems to end abruptly. And don't you worry! You may feel sorry for Mamoru, but they'll soon find ways to evade the rules…hehehe… I also originally had _All guests must maintain at least a __two __foot distance from residential members of the household, as per__ standard safety precautions _as Rule Three, but then I thought, that would be no fun! So I took it out!! I mean, how do you evade that one? If anyone can think of anything, I'll re-add it.

Oh yeah, I'm not sure if I should increase the rating or not. T might be a bit of a stretch.

Review, of course, and tell me what you think. I'm on my way updating other stories, only I've got to finish summer reading and all this other stuff so don't expect anything too soon.


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